Benelli Forum banner
1 - 3 of 3 Posts

Senior Post Whore
2,931 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
for our English friends;)

[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]How do you disperse an angry Scottish mob?
Take up a collection.

[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]One year in winter there was three months of unbroken blizzards and Jimmy hadn’t been seen in the village for weeks, so a Red Cross rescue team struggled to his remote croft at the head of the glen were they found it was completely buried with only the chimney showing.
‘Jimmy?’ they shouted down the chimney. ‘Are you there?’
‘Who's that?’ Jimmy replied.
‘It’s the Red Cross,’ they said.
‘Piss off,’ shouted Jimmy. ‘I bought a flag last year!’

[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A woman and a man from Aberdeen were stranded on a desert island after a shipwreck. Their clothes were in rags and their food was running out.
‘I suppose it could always be worse,’ said the woman. ‘Oh, aye, it could,’ agreed the Aberdonian. ‘I nearly bought a return ticket.’

Why are Fifty pence peices shaped the way they are?
So that you can get them out of a Scotsmans hands with a spanner!

1 - 3 of 3 Posts